CHOOSING FRIENDS

Choosing friends is one important thing every person does in this life. The choice of friends decides the kind of future you are bound to live and the legacy you will leave. Often it is our friends that choose us, but have you ever thought of evaluating the kind of friend you are about to tie your destiny to.

Let us look into some considerations that are important when choosing your friends. 

How that prospective friend treats his or her old friends. If this friend could stop being friends with other friends, he or she can stop being yours. If this prospect slanders his or her old friends, be sure you will be slandered also.

Consider how this friend you intend to make treats his present friends. If that friend betrays the trust of the other friends he has, then he will betray your trust.

Check your principles and routine, if they do not match with those of your prospect. Let you just be acquainted to each other but do not let your relationship move further.  Be strong enough to remain alone for the things you believe in, then you will have the right friends.

Your friends should be your prop to your purpose. As much as you can, avoid the ones who make you lose your purpose in life. Hold on to your vision

Habits are built over a long time, killing them is close to impossible. The same are habits around how people treat their friends.

WILL POWER: IT DOES NOT MATTER WHERE YOU ARE BUT THE DIRECTION YOU ARE HEADED

It was long said that it does not matter where you are but the direction you are headed to. This statement is sometimes disturbing for those who take a keen look of their inside and see the struggle of the two opposing strengths; the strength to move on and the strength to give up and give in to failure.

This fight is an ever present fight in everyone and no one has the right to think him or herself lesser because of failing to accomplish the desired goal because the wrong side won. It is just a matter of understanding what is going on in your inside and controlling it on your outside.

Every human being has something that he or she feels powerless about. Some it is telling their friends no when no is the best answer ever. Some it is stepping away from the crowd, some it is alcohol. Some are overweight and they have no power over sugar. Some it is the lack are power over things that need patience.

I say powerless because it takes this power to do all that men and women achieve. It is the will power; everyone has the will to make the changes they need to make in their lives. But I will tell you this, the brain and emotions need to be exercised like muscles, and they grow stronger each day you try to use your will. They strengthen you each minute you fail and get up till finally you will be able to face your past and say you have prevailed.

So I heard my voice saying, it does not matter where you are or how many times you fall, it matters the direction you are headed to

BECOMING A LEADER

 Everyone is a leader, and all deserve to a following. It is only that we hardly ever think of strengthening our leadership traits to achieve great goals. You do not have to have a political, social or religious power to know that you are a leader. All you should always do is get prepared to offer leadership when the need arises. Always remember that your choices at any point in life affect so many people without you or them knowing. These are people already living or who will live so many years to come. By that simple reason, you are a leader; the difference is whether you are a good leader or a bad leader.

Leaders are like candles; they give light to people. They have the will and courage to be the first to catch fire and to melt for the sake of all. That is their purpose, serve humanity, in little and big ways. They give others the courage to come closer and light and to show their leadership, so the world does not depend on them alone. They inspire others to inspire and go their way, they in their secret corners command legions of change. Since their fire begun the lighting of candles, even if they are never remembered, their flames continue burning through history, because it is their fire that burns on the head of the candles.

Leadership is not always having people following you every time; it is about enabling people to have independent minds. This is good in a society that really needs diversity. But we have been raised in a society that believes in concentration of power. Socrates and Confucius believed in a society of enabling each other, but we are taught tyranny and force to be leadership yet we are encouraged to adore these noble people. The cost of free will is continuously rising, but the new leadership that understands the power of lighting the candle heads should be motivated.

So many times people say that to be a leader you have to have people follow you. That is not true all the time, sometimes you will walk alone if you are a leader. Sometimes you will look back and see you alone because you have ventured into the depths or into the waters that people fear.

If you perceive clearly, leadership is not all about having people follow you. It is about you having a will strong enough to avoid needless followings and enabling others to do that. It is the strength within to be as comfortable alone as in a multitude. It is the understanding that as unperceived as your leadership is, it moves a great multitude. See your crowd even if they are blind to you; serve them even if they will never know. Be like a father who protects his children even when they show a little respect. Be more than others.

You hardly ever know how many people look up to you and love you. You may one day be amazed at how many people will stand on your side on the day you are falling. Sometimes you may be at the helm of what people would call leadership and be surprised of how alone you will fall. All that does not matter; it only matters if you can control your will.

Today I will leave you with a simple task. Ask yourself if you can always trust your decision and choices. And if you were another person who knew the subtle details of your choices, would you follow you. If you are seeking an elective position and you were totally a different man, would you vote for yourself. If you are a father and consider if you would be your own son or daughter and you knew all you keep a secret, would you like to call the man your father?

If you would be proud of your leadership in another personality, you are a leader. But if you are not proud of it, and you hold such a position in people’s lives, you can still do much better because you have all it takes.